My oldest daughter sits in the very last row of the bus. Each morning, after she boards, she presses her face against the back window and waves to me as the big yellow bird rumbles away. I stand there and wave back, blowing kisses and giving thumbs-up signs, for as long as I can see Read More
In elementary school, while studying the Civil War one day, I raised my hand in class and said, “My dad says that the reason so many black people have the last name Booker is because we were slave owners.” Mrs. Rivera shot back, “That’s nothing to be proud of!” I cried in class that day. Read More
Most nights, I let my kids watch the evening news. This is partly because I want to watch it and they just won’t go away. But also, I like exposing them to death and destruction so they’ll appreciate the fact that I keep them breathing every day. Earlier this week, a story aired about a Read More
Seven years ago this week, I sat on my sofa and watched my hometown drown. Hurricane Katrina had dealt her knockout blow and moved on, but the city of New Orleans, at first just reeling and shaken, gasped for air as a sea of brown water crept ever higher. You know the rest. A few Read More
On several occasions in the not-too-distant past, I visited a local abortion clinic to pee in a cup. It was always in the wake of an artificial insemination, and I was desperate to be pregnant. There I sat in the waiting room with a bevy of young women, most of them bleary-eyed and resigned, waiting Read More
Great Balls of Dog Hair, this blog is so much work. Really. Like right now, at 6:37 am on a Saturday morning, all I want to do is scroll through Facebook and read about how John Travolta is gay, and I’m stuck here with a blank screen trying to come up with something funny/poignant/revealing/life-altering to Read More
As I’ve advised before, if you are uncomfortable with gay marriage, I would strongly urge you to avoid marrying a gay person. That would be a relationship destined for failure. Set your sights on someone else, preferably an enlightened person who can teach you to think more clearly. Because choosing your marriage partner is your Read More
In high school, I dated a really nice guy with a big nose whose deodorant smell was overpowering. I went out with him because nobody else was asking me out. One summer, when I was 16, we went to The Boot, a famous local bar near the campus of Tulane University that didn’t check IDs. Read More
Oh, poor underdeveloped, overrated Tropical Storm Beryl. Worry not, for judging by the amount of damage inflicted in my home, you had the strength of a hurricane. Furniture upended, strips of paper strewn about, Sharpie streaks on the counter, every clean sheet unfolded, Dorito chips in the bathroom. Who eats Doritos in the bathroom? My Read More
I read The Hunger Games to figure out why I was the only person in North America who hadn’t. Then earlier this week, I saw the movie because I unexpectedly had a babysitter and no plans. And here’s my assessment: The popcorn was excellent. I love popcorn. But here’s the problem with movie popcorn: it’s Read More
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