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NOTE: This is a guest editorial I wrote for the current issue of Folio Weekly magazine in Jacksonville, Fla. In the summer of 2020, my son will be 15 years old. I imagine him riding his bike to the beach. Maybe he’s not wearing a shirt, and has a hat perched backwards on his head. Maybe [...] WARNING! Adoption-related rant ahead. It’s unfortunate that we must maintain a separate genre of manners entitled Adoption Etiquette, but we must. Frankly we additionally should have Big Belly Etiquette, Wheelchair Etiquette, Birthmark Etiquette, and Yes-that’s-my-real-hair-color Etiquette, because people have lost all self-control when it comes to curbing their insatiable appetites for details of other people’s lives. [...] The Pterodactyl wants to see a picture of his birth mother, and I don’t want to show it to him. Now that he’s five, he thinks he has all sorts of rights. He forages through the pantry right before dinner and begins late-night projects involving tape and dental floss. You know what we do about that? [...] |
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