September 2010
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Excuse me, sir, you dilapidated pile of dust

I consider myself a mannerly person, and reasonably pleasant. I say please and thank you, as in “Please, son, the fish does not need you to pet him,” and “Thank you, darling, but I don’t care for that particular piece of gum right now, so put it back in the cupholder.”

I try to avoid being [...]

2010. I've gotta do it again?

It has come to my attention that some of you people think I make stuff up.

I understand that not everyone’s son uses his father’s stethoscope to listen to the dishwasher running and not all 3-year-olds slap their mothers in the face for forcefeeding them Children’s Tylenol, which I did because she has an ear infection [...]

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