The Family Cast
The Diva: my 8-year-old drama queen. She has eaten noodles every single day for the past five years, loves her new iPod and hopes to be famous one day. She likes wedge heels and lipstick and Taylor Swift.
The Pterodactyl: he's five. He loves trains, volcanoes, tomatoes, and talking about my boobs. His younger sister's mere existence has ruined his life.
The Tyrant: she's a very bossy three. She curses, throws things, hates wearing underpants and refuses to brush her hair. She knows the words to most Lady Gaga songs.
Hot Firefighter Husband: he loves sports, politics, clean floors and me. He gets really annoyed by laundry, Ann Curry, tapas restaurants and me. He edited this.
Damn Gem: the dog. She eats paper which I end up pulling out of her butt.
