September 2010
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Scary me, and how I'm apelike

I think I broke my little pinky toe.

Now the top of my foot is blue and my pinky toe looks like a fat bald mouse. And of course I keep tripping over the dog, the toy recycling truck, the children, whatever – and re-banging the shit out of the broken toe, which hurts like a [...]

The Latin term for the hoo-hah. It rhymes with goose.

The Tyrant’s obsession with the human body – and bodily functions – has expanded beyond family boundaries.

Today was the Mother’s Day Tea at her preschool. I wore a sundress to look a little bit fancy. She wore a tutu, of course. As I sat at the 2-foot high table nibbling on a mini-cupcake, I [...]

The Tyrant's active lifestyle, or how to recycle a Starbucks cup

The Tyrant has become so busy with life that she doesn’t have time to fulfill basic human needs. It’s not an attractive trait.

Yesterday we were outside playing and the Diva fell off her bike and scratched her ankle. Obviously she needed to be carried inside, snuggled on the couch with a blanket, and made [...]

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